Victims of Circumstances

I was just wondering the other day how most of us become victims of circumstances. All of us react differently under different circumstances. Of course, that’s how it should be. But sometimes one does come across situations where reactions change in the same scenario.

I don’t want to create any more complexity. So let me get straight to the point. But before that I would like to recollect an incident that happened in my life very recently. It’s a very common incident that could possibly happen in any one’s life but just that probably there are only few people who could have given a thought to it.

Well, recently I was traveling by bus when as it usually happens, a lady with a baby asked for my seat. Now, I hate sitting in the aisle. You become the target of “some”(not all) old people asking for seats shouting so loudly as to how young people of today don’t even have manners and courtesy to offer seats (I wonder how they think this kind of shouting would actually work!! Infact I feel more irritated to give seats to such old people) or they really start pleading and begging with you so much that you feel so low and cheap of yourself to have even got into a bus so much so that you even consider walking from your home to destination instead of depriving them of their seats (Grrr!!), ladies with babies, school kids (No, not school kids. It’s actually the people standing next to the kids who urge you to give your seat to “the poor little kid standing with such a heavy bag”..Bah!! I don’t see a poor little kid..I rather see a happy kid laughing and blabbering something to his/her friends and who is so lost in conversation that he/she won’t even realize that somebody is talking about him/her), some irritating jerks who love to keep brushing against you or some irritating lady who keeps on hitting your head with her hand bag or her elbow (When you kindly tell her that her bag is hitting your head, she apologies furiously and hugs her bag closely only to let go of it after a while and yes, it hits you hard enough to make ya dizzy, just like how you would feel if a punch bag hits you from far-“Thud”)

Anyways, over to what I wanted to say. A lady with a baby asked for my seat and I, with no other choice, got up and let her sit. My head started making a 360-degree turn to see if anybody was getting up to get down at their stop. As it happens usually, nobody got up. And well all of a sudden, a “kind” lady is mid forties called me and gave her seat before she got up to get down at her bus stop. For a moment, I was kind of taken aback coz nobody has ever done this for me before. I mean a stranger. I just smiled back at her. It didn’t even strike me to thank her!!!What a fool I’m!!

It’s only after I sat, I glanced across and saw a girl standing right next to me. She had been standing there even before the lady with a baby asked for my seat. She was standing there so that she could occupy the seat when the kind lady in mid-forties got up to get down at her stop. But as fate turned out, I got to sit and she was still standing. That’s when I started to think as to how we all become victims of circumstances.In this current situation, I call the lady in mid forties who offered her seat to me as a “kind” person and I’m so “happy” that I got a seat to sit. But what if it was the other way around? What if I was the girl waiting to get the seat when the lady in mid forties got down while the girl was me who had lost her seat to some lady with the baby. In that case, I suppose I would have been so irritated and bugged up. I would have thought “Stupid lady! Can’t she see that there are other people standing as well? Can’t she jus get up and get down at her stop? What’s her problem now? And look at this girl. Another moron.Atleast she should have refused when the lady offered. Why God Why? Why does this happen to me?…Blah..Blah..Blaa Bla Blah Blah Blaaaaaaaaah”

In the same situation, the same lady would be perceived in a different notion under different circumstances. The kind lady becomes a stupid moron. The happy “me” becomes an irritated and frustrated “me”.

This isn’t a big discovery. But it is just a simple truth of how we react so fast in a given situation…of how we make remarks…of how we comment.. of how we express…and of how we feel..but not once we apply our mind..and not once do we put ourselves in the other person’s shoes and think of it in a different light!!

Mon amour de langue française!!

J'aime la langue française. D'une manière ou d'une autre c'est une vraiment belle langue avec un beau son à lui. Bien que je sais le français seulement à l'étendue de Tours de Malory du Blyton d'Enid et à la collection de St.Clare, d'une manière ou d'une autre j'aime juste cette langue. La façon que les mots sont prononcés en français est simplement si agréable pour entendre. ..so beau ! ! !


Translating to English...

[I love the french language..Somehow it's a really beautiful language with a beautiful sound to it..Although I know french only to the extent of Enid Blyton's Malory Towers and St.Clare's series, somehow I just love this language..The way the words are pronounced in french is simply so nice to hear..so beautiful!!!]

Ah...What fun!!I don't even know a phrase in French..Then, how did I manage to get a whole para in french??Well I got the translation done from here...Dunno how perfect it is!!

My encounters with french were very brief..As I had mentioned earlier, I came to know of few words of french from Enid Blyton's Malory Towers and St.Clare's series..And then at school, we were given an option for our second language..Tamil, Hindi, French or Sanskrit..I love my mother tongue, Tamil!!Now that would be a separate post in itself..my love for Tamil..Let it come up some other time..Now lets just stick to french..So yeah..I wanted to take french or Tamil so badly...But alas my fate rested with Hindi..Well, speaking of Hindi..I hate it!!I simply hate Hindi..My love for Tamil is inversely proportional to my love for Hindi!!Oh good lord I don't even want to use the words "love" and "Hindi" in the same sentence..Okay, my dislike for Hindi is also a separate post in itself..So lets just concentrate on french as of now..Since my dad had always had the possibility of getting transferred to a Hindi-speaking state, I was made to undergo the torture of learning Hindi right from 2nd grade..Man..I hated it!!Big time..Oh there I go..I keep drifting away from french yet again..Anyways I never got the opportunity to read french although I must say, when I used to look at the french books, it used to actually freak me out..Well, my school life got over with "no learning of french"...I do remember back in 10th grade hols, me and Shwe had these big plans of going to Alliance française and doing a course on French..But well the plan never materialised..I have decided that someday I'll definitely learn french..learn to speak it!!!

Anyways, this sudden post on my love for french was kindled by one of my good friend, CC...CC aka Chubby cheeks has recently started blogging with an attitude of "Blogging, here I come"[Man..I'm so proud of myself..I inspired her too!!!or rather pestered her;)] and well the very title of her blog is so french french- c'est la vie!!

So yeah, this is a post inspired by a post!!Lots of inspiration going around....

Today is January 9, 2009

As I had mentioned in my previous post, today, that is January 9, 2009, marks 1 year of me stepping into blogosphere!!So I just thought I'll write something...

Hmmm...What to write about??Alright probably I should share whatever happened in this one year blogging time.

I came to know of this stuff called blogging when I used to hear my uncle and aunt talk about my cousin sis's blog. She is this awesome blogger who is damn good at writing!!!Also, I had a friend in school named Vishnupriya who used to be a blogger.So even before I started out as a blogger, I used to read these two people's blog. That was it. I had no intention of becoming a blogger myself. That's when a closed one of mine introduced me to his cousin sister's blog, that is, Prithz. When I started reading Prithz's blog, I was so inspired by it that I decided to write as well. And so began my venture into blogging on January 9, 2008. From Vishnu, I came across this wonderful service of Google called Google reader. Reader helps you to have access to all the updates of your favourite blogs. It's basically a blog bookmark, I would say. And so lo, anytime I came across an awesome blog, it went right into my reader. I came to know of many such blogs from prithz' blog .In this way, I caught up with two other wonderful bloggers-The Mask and twisted DNA(affectionately called "TD").The Mask has the specialty of really interesting stories, funny dialogue conversations and his take on the real world whereas TD just tickled my funny bone so much so that there were days when I used to start coughing badly after laughing my heart out. Even now, the first name that comes up when anybody asks about blogs is that of TD's.And then there is my aunt and another cousin sis of mine who became a part of Google reader too. Recently, via Vishnu's blog, I found Everyone's entitled to my opinion-Yet another interesting person with neat posts. Initially when I started out, I let out posts at a very good frequency. But I had this huge problem of using SMS lingo. Man, we are so used to messaging and SMS lingo that it was so tough adapting back to regular and proper English. I didn't even realise that I was writing in a lingo that most people would wonder what I'm actually scribbling there. My aunt brought me into place there. It was she who told me to have a look about it. And yes, I’m proud to say I've worked upon it and this very post is an evidence for it. Well yeah back to what I wanted to say. This really bubbling interest of mine got reduced really soon. As time passed by, the lack of time and the content feeling of just reading other's blog took over and I just stopped posting. Just became a regular commenter of all my favourites!!Very recently, as I had mentioned in my previous post, few friends of mine took up blogging after I kept on nudging them to do it. Seeing these people write, brought me back into place and that's when I decided that I should be writing stuffs into my blog too. And that's how right from the start of the year, I have put up posts like there's no tomorrow. And well there's nothing left to say more. That’s all it. Purpose of post served.

Well, I take this moment to share Pal's blog- a friend of mine. This guy is so damn philosophical and writes great poems. Must look out blog I would say!!!

Alright people! Happy 1 year blogging to me!!

Tc...Cya!!

A year gone...

Well well I can't believe this...Come January 9, 2008 and I've been in touch with my blogging side for a year.Yay!!!Now that calls for a celebration!!

I haven't been a good blogger now.Barely 21 posts in one year and now that sucks man!!Big tym!!I think by the time I celebrate the second year anniversary, I should be a blogger who maintains a good frequency!!I hope

Now,as I had mentioned in my very first post, Prithz was my inspiration to start writing a blog. And I'm really proud to announce that I've inspired a few too.So let me bring in the newbies who have started giving out the best posts already!!

Kutty Ma, Ashy, Raki and Raki yet again are these newbies and yeah encourage them people!!

Kutty Ma and Ashy's are daily rants, thoughts and all crazy stuffs!!

Raki has two blogs-One dedicated to poems and another dedicated to his words!!

Check it out, guys!!I hope they aren't inspired by me a lot in the frequency sense too..

Alright guys,keep the good work flowing!!!

Cya..tc!!Luv...

Platonic Relations

The other day, while aimlessly surfing the TV, I started watching the movie "Shall we dance?" starring Richard Gere (My guy would look like him when he gets old. What a man!!), Jennifer Lopez (Hot!!) and Susan Sarandon (Beautiful she's). It’s a nice movie as far as I had seen. Sorry I can't review it further coz I just saw the movie in bits and pieces.

And as such this post is not about that.

Well, this post is actually about a quote from the movie. Richard Gere (or John Clark as in this movie) speaks the following line to his wife:

"The one thing I am proudest of my whole life, is that you were happy with me. If I couldn't, if I couldn't tell you that I was unhappy sometimes, it's because I didn't want to risk hurting the one person I treasure most. I'm so sorry"

Courtesy: IMDB

It just threw me back when I heard this line. What does this line signify? All right let me tell you under what circumstances John Clark uttered this line to his wife in the movie. The movie is about Richard Gere (John Clark or lets just call him JC), who is a lawyer by profession. He has this happy family. But, somehow he is not happy with the life he's living. He feels he lacks something in the life he lives. That’s when I suppose he joins this dancing class and then he gets all obsessed about dancing and even participates in some kind of competition. But he keeps this dancing classes stuff away from his wife because he doesn't want her to know as to why he took up dancing class. But finally his wife figures out about his dancing class and also comes to know of the reason as to why he chose it. And that's when he quotes the above-mentioned line to his wife. Forgive me, if my synopsis is wrong. As I told you before, I just watched the movie in bits and pieces. Actually missed the whole first hour or so.

Anyways getting back to what I wanted to say in ma post.

Recently I had this huge tiff with one of my very close friend. This quote from the movie kind of reminds me about the tiff I had. He did something for me that he didn't want to or wasn't happy about doing just because he loved me and didn't want to see me hurt. Of course in the movie, it’s the other way around. JC likes to dance since he feels his life is complete when he does it but he hides the fact from his wife in order to not make her feel responsible for his unhappy times. In my case, it’s a bit more complicated than the movie.But well I was just wondering if doing something like this was right in any sense? Even if you love a person so much, does it actually make sense in doing something that you don't want to be a part of? Aren’t you being unfair to the person whom you love there? You aren't telling them the truth. You are hiding the truth from them just because you don't want to hurt them. But the very fact that you hid something from them tampers the love you have for them. In any bond or relationship, if something is being hidden, it just shows that there's something wrong out there. You being unable to discuss your feelings and opinions show there's a barrier that needs to be broken. Well, fine you do something that you don't like just for their sake. But isn't there a limit or extent to which you can do certain things for others. You can compromise on little things. But can you compromise on the very reason that makes you do it? A bond between two persons should have absolute transparency between the both of them. Otherwise, it just spoils the essence of it. What do you mean by understanding then? In such a case, knowing a person would mean knowing everything about them-Their likes, dislikes, opinions, etc. When you aren't fine with something, you should let the other person know about it and should also make them aware of the reason as to why you dislike it. Trust me, if you matter to the person so much, they would understood your issue instead of getting hurt or angry about it. This friend of mine thought it would hurt me if he said a "No”. Well it actually hurts me to think he didn't have the kind of comfort to discuss it out with me. It’s hard and it's tough. You have this great bond, a platonic one in its true terms and the very foundation of it shakes. It makes you wonder how did it become a platonic one with such a major flaw in it. It makes you so vulnerable. It makes you doubt all the bonds that you have with others. You are so confused. You feel so numb. You just sit still with various thoughts striking your head and you just keep asking "Why? Why? Why?" unable to answer them yourselves. You are angry. You are hurt. You are irritated and frustrated. It can't be sympathy. But that's the closest word you get. You are broken and crushed. You feel cheap and ugly. You wonder how come you didn't realize all these days. You think of the past and shrink away from it. You feel low. You can't believe it happened with you all the time. All the time when you believed it was something else. And finally the truth hits you. It hits you hard. You fall. You fall back lifeless and hopeless. You are unable to explain how you feel. The person who understood you all these days is the person with whom the tiff is and now even he fails to understand. You feel alone. Your other friends are there for you and each of them are trying to console you. Each of them has their own theory. As far as you are concerned, you know and you don't know. But you are still unable to do anything about it. The hurt is done. The scar is left. You don't know when it'll heal and others don't know that there's a scar. You ask for time and you are given time. You wonder "how much" more time it'll take while others wonder "why so much" time she takes.

You look back at your past and you regret. You look forth at your future and just don’t find any.

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Read this article recently in Rouge, a supplement of times of india

The article is about the 5 types of men that every women should have.This one interested me.

"THE PLATONIC ONE
Every girl must have (if one doesn’t already) a guy who’s her best pal. He’s a good listener, he’ll give you sound advice, he’s fun, you’ll probably share similar interests, you can call him in times of emotional crisis and expect to feel better, he understands you and doesn’t judge you at the drop of a hat! He’ll always be there for you, no matter what"

Well I thought I had one..But now it's more like I used to have...

To whomsoever it may concern...

TO WHOMSOEVER IT MAY CONCERN

"This is an age where one tends to get carried away..This is the time when you have to show what you are actually made of...Stand up against the hormones and face the world with "I can do it" attitude..And just remember, never ever do something that you may have to regret later!!"

"An angel you are..An angel I want you to remain..Beauty and charm lies inside..And in the long run, that is what people see..Show them who you are inside.."

"Immaturity defines you..You are still being a kid who has just entered his/her teen age..You have begin to learn how your reactions affect people..People who love you unconditionally are hard to get...Don't lose them"

"Patience and tolerance that you show amazes everyone I know...But just be careful that one day you might not want to lose patience on yourself or is unable to tolerate your very own behaviour..You know what you are worthy of..Be proud of yourself.."

"It's a battle betweem your heart and your mind...Face it strong, keep your emotions under check and you'll emerge out a winner..The bonds that you formed are the bonds that will stay.."

"You are a gem of a person...Your love fascinates one and all..The beholder holds you proudly...Know why she's proud of you..You might learn things about yourself that you never thought you were.."

"You are a living example for others...But how do you feel about yourself?Aren't you still searching for answers?"

"You are ever welcome..and I hope you realise that..You are always a part of our joys and sorrows.."

"Long lost you are...But you are someone whom I was always curious about.."

"You are one person whom I feel knows what he wants MOST of the time..You do tend to make mistakes...Admitting it would make you grow more than you want to.."

"This is more like advicing myself..And that's because of who you are..Know the people around you and understand as to why they are there for you..You'll have your peace of mind"

"Your life-style is not ma cuppa tea...I jus't want ya to look back and tell me if you'll be ever happy with your past in future?"

"Being with you is full of fun and frolic..But just remember that people just don't look for fun and frolic in friends..They look out for other characteristics as well!!"

A year of emotions...

The other day me and ma colleague were talking about the year 2008 and he jus commented that his year was a great one for him and that's when I wondered about how my year was.

And well, after that I read Kutty Ma's post in her blog and that's when I decided I should write about my year too!!

Some worthy and not-so-worthy things that happened in this year:

1) Exploring relationship and taking it to new heights - Which had its series of crazy moments, fun-filled times, happiness, suprises, fights, make-ups, understanding, reaching to emotions and what not!!

2) Meeting Niti and Binal - Two people who made me feel so comfy in their presence and who could put up with my nonsense.

3) Learning more in tax - Makes me pretty much confident in handling it now..

4) The number of outings to Chennai - It was awesome and always makes me ask for more!!

5) Making and breaking bonds

6) Going through numerous emotions - Love, hate, disappointment, Suprises, heart-breaks, tears, laughter, freaking out, loathing, understanding, jealousy, break downs, dedication, committment, sincerity, true love, care, concern, attitude change, learning and still learning....

7) Reliance mobile - Investment of the year!!

8) Juggling with PCC and Articleship

9) Maintaining the cool at home..and yeah losing it at times too..

10) Solving so many complex issues or just breaking my head over it

11) Meeting new people and gaping in horror or at awe at them!!

12) Learning to love myself and lose my inhibitions - If not for you....

13) Trying hard at reduing temper and still trying so..

14) Made mature decisions..

And there are so much more I suppose...

All I could possibly say was 2008 was "a year of emotions"....A worthy phase of life where I learnt, thought, implemented, understood and gladly accepted that the learing never ceases!!

Happy new year one and all!!Let the new year be as enlightening as possible for you!!